Doh! DeFazio demands an investigation...

SimpsonspadLike many Oregonians, Congressman Peter DeFazio was outraged by the recent vote that declared Springfield, Vermont the official home of "The Simpsons".

He's now sent a letter to Attorney General Alberto Gonzales demanding an investigation into vote fraud and the giant pink donut - and included a photo to prove that The Simpsons are his constituents.

Heidely Ho Attorney General Gonzales:

I write to you to express the outrage that I, and all Oregonians, feel regarding a recent event. I know there is a strong possibility that you may come back and say that you "don't recall" to what I am referring, so let me refresh your memory. Recently, 20th Century Fox launched The Simpson's Movie Springfield Challenge where people could vote on the real-life location of the home of The Simpsons. Naturally, most Oregonians felt confident that we would win, since it is obvious to everyone that Simpson's creator Matt Groening, who was raised in Oregon, modeled Springfield after his childhood home. Oregon has over 363 miles of the most beautiful coastline in America, the Cascade Mountains, and is the grass seed capital of the world. What does Vermont have? Maple syrup.

This travesty must not stand. Springfield, Vermont is a town of only nine thousand people; yet this community received over fifteen thousand votes. Unless they passed a law giving cows the right to vote, this smacks of election fraud. It also once again highlights the need for electronic voting with a valid paper trail. Was Diebold in any way involved in tabulating the results?

Additionally, it's my understanding that Springfield, Vermont entered the competition after the deadline. That's clearly an election violation since they should not have been listed on the ballot in the first place.

Some people will say that we were rolled by the giant pink doughnut, but I believe there were significant voting irregularities. Knowing how passionately the Bush Administration feels about counting every vote, I'm sure you will want to investigate this matter. Additionally, I urge you to petition the Supreme Court to review the facts and consider whether or not this election should be set aside. Given the Court's recent rulings on election proceedings, I'm sure they will be eager to review the case. I demand that you investigate this miscarriage of justice and restore Oregon as the definitive home of The Simpsons.

Okiliydokily,

PETER DeFAZIO
Member of Congress

Hat tip to Chuck Currie.

Discuss.

  • (Show?)

    Great -- good for DeFazio. I can't help but think, though, that he should be pushing for investigations into things that perhaps really matter to the future of our country -- i.e. torture, subversion of due process, global warming, etc. Not that I don't like the Simpsons, I'm just a bit more attached to the integrity of our Constitution.

  • Duke Shepard (unverified)
    (Show?)

    Kristin, get a grip. It is possible to do a job, be outraged about the state of the country, fight for what's right, and have a sense of humor at the same time. D I doubt that the 20 minutes it took to put this little letter together indicate that DeFazio lost track of the fact that we're at war ( a war he didn't vote for), that trade is costing us jobs, that the Attorney General is a lying crook, or that Cheney is running the country.
    The letter is funny. It's OK to laugh once in a while. Really it is. I volunteer to send you $20 bucks so you can go to a comedy club and squeeze a laugh out. Post an address or a paypal account and it will be on it's way.
    It doesn't make a member of congress any less committed to fixing the country if for 30 minutes they do something that isn't as serious as a heart attack. Believe me, I used to work for the guy, and I 'm pretty sure that as a general rule he's as outraged about the state of the country as you are. You ever watch him give a speech on C-Span?
    But he's just also got the ability to laugh once in awhile. I suspect that most people do to. Tun off the computer late one night and watch Conan O'Brien or David Letterman - it won't hurt, I promise.
    And Springfield, OR was robbed. I demand a recount too. I think Monty Burns was giving people walking around money for their votes.

  • (Show?)

    That's too funny. I love the picture.

    Stuff like this really shows you the person behind the Congressman.

  • (Show?)

    Duke,

    No need for condescension or insults -- and as I said, I love the Simpsons. And I did think the letter was funny and I do appreciate a joke. And I used to work for DeFazio, too. I just don't think James Madison would be laughing all that much these days.

  • (Show?)

    Actually, I think in times like these, it is all the more important to laugh. Otherwise you just might end up depressed or angry.

  • (Show?)

    Actually, that should be depressed or crazy... we're already angry.

  • (Show?)

    Jenni,

    I totally agree -- I think I would laugh the most at the teeth marks of our Congress people all over the George W. Bush's backside. That's a joke I'd love....

  • (Show?)

    Kristin:

    Wouldn't we all.

  • Eric J. (unverified)
    (Show?)

    This is a waste of taxpayer money and time. I didn't think that Peter would be so bored in his job that he would degrade himself to complain about a cartoon. There are much bigger issues than this to gripe about, Peter. Either do your job the right way or quit. If you are so bored as to waste time on this, you need to seek other employment. This is not about a sense of humor, it's about being bored with your life to do something exteremely stupid.

  • nothstine (unverified)
    (Show?)

    DeFazio's letter is in the same odd tradition of taking out time in the Legislature to vote for an official State Fungus, and such. You don't worry about the small amount of time it wastes, you just feel grateful they're having a more or less human moment, and then shake it off.

    Truth be told, though, asking Gonzales to investigate something on behalf of the state of Oregon is a fool's errand. The only way Gonzales might get involved in a Simpson-related matter would be if he heard this guy was trying to vote in a federal election.

    bn

  • (Show?)

    Eric J wrote, There are much bigger issues than this to gripe about...

    Yup. Good advice to take yourself, too.

  • jeffk (unverified)
    (Show?)

    The problem I have with this is not that DeFazio is having a little fun, but that he's including Gonzales.

    At this point, if Gonzales had any ethics or morals, he'd resign. Since that hasn't happened, I think that until he can be forced out, he should be shunned. The letter should have been addressed to someone important, not that weasel Gonzales.

  • wendy williams (unverified)
    (Show?)

    Waste Schmaste! Yer all nuts!!!!

    The home of Homer et. al. is Springfield, Massachusetts.

    Can't y'all hear the accent of the Tedster coming out of the Mayor's mouth?

    And if that doesn't clinch it for you, just contemplate how much Edward M. just LUVs giant pink donuts.

    If you don't believe me, just call Kennedy's senate office in D.C. They'll tell ya!

    Springfield is ours! We even (almost) have our own nuke. (OK, so it may be just across the border in Vermont, but it's alot closer to us that it is to that upstart up in the Green Mountains!

    Without us, Homer is NUTHIN' Wendy

  • anonymous (unverified)
    (Show?)

    This is a joke. DeFazio didn't really write this.

    Dems joking about vote theft and travesty of democracy. That's real funny stuff. Why don't y'all just grab a cold can of Duff's beer and switch from the Itchy and Scratchy Show over to The Colbert Report. The power elite of this nation are burying the heals of their jack-booted thugs in your faces and it's all just a joke. Seems about right. That's how the Dem leaders you venerate think about you.

  • Adrian R (unverified)
    (Show?)

    Whatever. It's sorta clever when you think about it. Gonzales has turned his position into a joke, so therefore he should be more than qualified to handle investigations of this nature. I guess subtlety is lost on some people these days.

  • dartagnan (unverified)
    (Show?)
    <h2>Eric J, you sound like one of those dour humorless types who give liberalism a bad name. Lighten up, eh?</h2>
in the news 2007

connect with blueoregon